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Mbega nomenya gute ko umukobwa turi kumwe mu rukundo anyiyumvamwo kandi (...) - IGIHE Burundi
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Accueil > Imibano > Urukundo > Mbega nomenya gute ko umukobwa turi kumwe mu rukundo anyiyumvamwo kandi (...)

Mbega nomenya gute ko umukobwa turi kumwe mu rukundo anyiyumvamwo kandi tuzorambana

lundi 24 Ruheshi 2013

Abakobwa bose babwira abasore ko babakunda siko baba babakunda vy’ukuri canke bipfuza kumara nabo igihe kirekire kuko hari igihe usanga umukobwa akubwira ko agukunda, ariko akaba yumva atipfuza kuzokwubakana nawe.

Umuhungu rero wese yama yibaza ingene yoshobora kumenya namba umukobwa amukunda vy’ukuri canke namba amuhenda bagateshanya umwanya. Abahinga berekanye ko hariho ubuhinga bwo kubibona ugendeye ku bimenyetso bimwe na bimwe nk’ uko akuraba, inyifato yiwe imbere yawe, amajambo akubwira iyo muri kumwe canke n’ ibindi bimenyetso bitandukanye agenda akwereka igihe cose mumaze kwemeranya ko muri mu rukundo.

Ibi ni bimwe mu bimenyetso nyamukuru 10 ushobora kugenzurirako, ukamenya namba umukobwa agukunda vy’ukuri canke ari indyarya, yishakira ko uba uramumara irungu mu kurindira ko yironkera uwo umutima wiwe wikundira.

1. Iyo umukobwa agukunda vy’ukuri akaba anakwiyumvamwo, uzosanga akunda ko muguma muganira kandi naho mwomara igihe kirekire ntaco bimutwara kuko aba ashimishwa no kuganira n’ umukunzi wiwe

Burya namba umukobwa agukunda ntazigera yitesha amahirwe yo kukubona canke kukuvugisha, kuko mu kiganiro mugirana uzobona ashaka kukwishura buri kimwe umubajije, ugasanga arakubaza vyinshi bikwerekeye mu ntumbero yo gushaka kukumenya bikwiye kandi umubwiye ko ushaka ko mubonana akavyumva vuba, ntarondere impamvu z’uko adashobora kuboneka, ndetse mumaze kubonana, muriko muraganira ukabona akwitegereza, agutwengera, akagira n’ uruhara mu kiganiro, iki ngo ni ikimenyetso gikomeye kizokwereka ko agukunda vy’ ukuri.

2. Akubwira abagenzi biwe b’inkoramutima kandi akakwereka abavukanyi n’umuryango wiwe. Anezerezwa no kubwira abantu bose ko uri umukunzi wiwe.

Umukobwa iyo agukunda nta kibazo bimutera kukwereka abagenzi biwe, ndetse usanga anakuvuga kenshi mu gihe ari kumwe nabo, ugasanga nta kibazo afise co kukuvuga canke kuba ari kumwe nawe imbere y’abavukanyi biwe canke abavyeyi biwe.

3. Mu gihe muriko muraganira, usanga ashimishwa no kugukorako, igihe cose ashimishwa no gukora ku mukunzi wiwe.

Namba umukobwa w’umugenzi wawe bisanzwe iyo muri kumwe akunda kugukorako kenshi, menya ko akwiyumvamwo kuko burya abakobwa muri kamere kabo umusore batiyumvamo bumva batonamwegera kuko iyo atagukunda yumva kugukoraho ataco bivuze bitewe n’uko atakwiyumvamwo neza.

4. Usanga akunda kukwigana mu bikorwa vyawe.

Muri ico gihe, usanga asigaye akunda kujana umukunzi wiwe kwicara ahantu hatekereje kuko yasanze ariho akunda. Niwatangura kubona ibimenyetso vy’ uko umukobwa yatanguye kuza akwigana muvyo ukora, akishimira gukora bimwe muvyo ukora, akarorero namba ukunda nko kuraba umupira uzosanga rimwe na rimwe nawe afashe umwanya wo kuja kuraba umupira, n’ ibindi azi ukunda akabiha umwanya mu nteguro y’ivyo ategekenya gukora. Iki naco ni ikimenyetso bizokwereka ko agukunda kandi ko yatanguye no kukwiyumvamwo.

5. Agira ishari iyo akubonanye n’abandi bakobwa, igihe cose akababazwa no kubona umukunzi wiwe ari kumwe n’abandi bakobwa.

Mu gihe ufise umukobwa w’umugenzi yawe, wavugana n’ abandi bakobwa agashavura canke akagira ishari, canke yakubonana n’ abandi bakobwa agaca aza aho muri akakwiyereka kugira ngo ubone aho ari, ni ikimenyetso kikwereka ko agukunda kuko umukobwa iyo akunda aranafuha.

6. Arondera impamvu zose zituma muhura

Akenshi muhura utabitegekanije, aha iyo akwiyumvamwo, aba yumva atomara akanya na gato atakubonye. Ivyo bituma arondera uburyo bwose akoresha kugira abe yokubona harimwo nko kwicisha mu nzira azi ko ukunda gucamwo, mu ntumbero yo kugira ngo muze guhura canke akarondera impamvu ishobora gutuma muhura.

7. Iyo azi ko muza guhura arikora agasa neza nk’uwugiye guhura n’umukunzi wiwe.

Namba umukobwa agukunda, agerageza uko ashoboye kugira ngo ase neza, cane cane iyo azi ko uri hafi y’aho ari, canke azi ko muza gusohokana. Igihe cose iyo muri kumwe, usanga aguma agenzura ko imisatsi yiwe imeze neza, ko impuzu ziwe ata kibazo zifise, mbere yikorera ubugenduzi budasanzwe kuko aba ashaka ko umubonamwo ubwiza budasanzwe kurusha uko wari umuzi.

8. Iyo muri kumwe ubona atekanye, ataco yikeka

Namba ubona muri kumwe akaba atekanye ataco yikeka, ntatinye amaso y’ abandi bamubona muri kumwe, uce umenya ko agukunda vy’ukuri. Ntaco yikanga iyo ari kumwe n’ umukunzi wiwe.
Ariko rero, niwabona afise impungenge zo kumarana igihe kinini nawe, ugasanga igihe muri kumwe nta mutekano aba afite rimwe na rimwe wipfuje ko muhura ngo muganire akarondera impamvu zituma mudashobora kubonana canke agashaka ko muhurira ahantu hinyegeje. Aha rero, muhungu kurako amaso kuko uwo mukobwa ntaba agukunda.

9. Aha agaciro iminsi ikomeye kuri wewe.

Abakobwa mu mico yabo bama bibuka igenekerezo bamenyaniyeko n’umuhungu. Namba yibuka umunsi mukuru wawe w’ amavuka, ugasanga avyamiza ku mutima, akagutegurira akaganuke, ugasanga azi ivyo wakoze mu gihe kanaka canke akibuka kahise kawe nk’umusi waronkeyeko urupapuro rw’umutsindo n’ ibindi, akaba yoguhamagara kuri ngendanwa akakwifuriza umunsi mwiza, rimwe na rimwe akaba yonaguha akaganuke n’aho ataco woba wibutse, menya neza ko agukunda kandi ko ahora akwiyumvira, akanipfuza icogushimisha.

10. Usanga iyo ariko arategura ubuzima bwiwe bw’ ejo hazoza nawe agushiramwo.

Ashimishwa no gushira umukunzi wiwe mu migambi yiwe.
Namba ubona ko umukobwa mukundana atigera ashima kwiyumva wenyene muvyo akora, canke muvyo ategekanya gukora akagushiramwo, menya ko agukunda kandi yipfuza ko muzorambana.

Egide Nduwimana

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